Remembering Jonathan's birth...

As we approach the birth of our second son, I have been thinking about the birth of our first.  Here is what happened.  I expect tomorrow to be much different...

Last June, I went into preterm labor (before 37 weeks pregnant).  I didn't know that was what was happening to me until I went to the Regency Hospital in my hometown and the doctor told me so.  He said the baby would likely not survive if we chose to have him, and if we wanted to be aggressive about saving him I could be flown to a hospital 30 miles away. 

Less than an hour later Jeff was driving as fast as he could to get to the hospital in Orlando, and I was en route by helicopter.  I was drugged up on magnesium sulfate which made me feel like my skin was burning from the inside out.  To make matters worse I was flying in a helicopter that was more like a fishbowl with no A/C.  The paramedics that were with me were sweating through their flight suits.  I felt bad for them.  I also physically felt bad, and I kept telling myself "Don't pass out, we're almost to the hospital..."  In hindsight, it may have been the perfect place to pass out seeing I had medical professionals with me.

Once I got to the hospital I was rushed to the labor and delivery floor where the doctors did an ultrasound and saw that the baby was ok.  The Mag (magnesium) was working and my contractions had stopped, but I was already 70% effaced (translation: there wasn't much barrier between my baby and birth).  I was so hot and thirsty.  Jeff was by my side keeping a wet wash cloth on my forehead.  He kept asking the doctor if I could have water and hours later he finally allowed me to eat some ice chips.  Around midnight I was allowed to eat, but anything I ate I threw up.

The rest of the night I tried to rest.  I had electronic monitors on my stomach to monitor my contractions and the baby's heart rate.  Since Jonathan was so little at that point (I was 23 weeks along), he kept moving away from the monitor and the nurse would have to come back and and readjust it.  Whenever I had to get up to use the bathroom, I had to wake Jeff up, have him help me unplug myself from the monitors and pull my IV cart with me.

Once the doctor felt sure I was not on the verge of delivering a baby, I was moved to the high-risk unit, for women who, for whatever reason, were in danger of having a baby.  The room we were in was the size of a shoebox.  There were much bigger, nicer rooms we were told, but they were all occupied and as soon as one became available we would be moved.  Jeff had to sleep in a recliner that reclined only to a 45 degree angle, so he had to sleep with his feet propped up on the bed as there was no room in our tiny room for an air mattress or cot.

I did pretty well in that tiny room.  I had contractions still, but they were not strong and my cervix was holding strong.  I had a medicine pump in my leg which is basically a needle attached to what looked like a pager (like what was cool before cell phones).  I kept the pager clipped to my hospital-issued underwear (those are SO sexy) and the needle was always in my thigh.  It gave me medicine every so often to keep the contractions away. 

After a couple of days we were awakened to the wonderful news that we would be movin' on up to the east side, ie the new high-risk rooms.  These rooms were spacious, had wonderful views, mini fridges and a lot of them had their own bathrooms (with showers!)  But wouldn't you know it, I went into labor not long after we were moved to our beautiful room.  So back to L&D we went, and if I remember correctly I was back on the Mag.

Hours later, once I was cleared again, we were at the bottom rung of the high risk rooms, and went right back to our shoebox.  It was only a day until we were moved to a better room, so we were thankful for that.

Once we got back to our nice room, we settled in.  I had my mom bring me a bunch of snacks for the mini fridge and got all my books and stuff situated in my bed-side table.  I was in it for the long-haul and had made it to 24 weeks (which is the "edge of viability" - the earliest a baby can be born and have a fair chance of survival). 

A few days later I awoke with a lot of pelvic pressure and feeling like I had to pee all the time.  The nurse thought I had a UTI so she was going to test me.  Jeff was preparing to head home as he had to prepare to lead worship at church.  I had a feeling that it wasn't a UTI and that something might be wrong (although I had no contractions for over 24 hours), so the nurse told Jeff to stay until a doctor could examine me.  A short time later, the doctor came in and did a pelvic exam.  "I'm not sure, but I think I feel the baby's head... Yes, that's a head.  She's 4 centimeters dilated." 

That was it.  I was being rushed back to L&D with the nurse loudly announcing to everyone "WE HAVE A 24 WEEKER!"  She kept telling me how remarkable it was that I was so calm and I thought "Why wouldn't I be?"  I wasn't having contractions, was in no pain, and thought they'd probably put me back on the Mag and things would go back to normal.

About an hour after they moved me to L&D, the contractions were hurting.  I was gripping the side of the bed and couldn't talk when they came on.  The nurses were acting like it was no big deal, so I was trying not to freak out although I knew this was very different from the other times I had been to L&D.  After about 15 minutes of the painful contractions I informed the nurse I was either going to puke or mess the bed because of the intense pressure I was feeling.  Her advice was "Don't push."  "Yeah right!" I thought.  My mom and Jeff were with me trying to keep me calm until the doctor could come see me.  I started feeling like I had to push or I'd die, so I did and my water burst.  Once that happened Jeff ran out into the hallway to get a nurse. 

After my water broke, I felt immediate relief and the contractions stopped.  Nonetheless, Jeff was suited up in his paper suit and we were being taken to the operating room.  The doctor did an ultrasound and saw I was dilated to 6 centimeters, and Jonathan's head was barely 5 cm.  "This baby is coming, you're going to have to push."  I couldn't bear to open my eyes.  I was hyperventilating and can remember the nurse telling me, "Blow out the candle...in through your nose out through your mouth...blow out the candle."  I wanted to hit her.  I didn't want to face that I had failed at staying pregnant and I certainly didn't want to deliver my baby 16 weeks before he was due.  But I pushed when they told me to, I think it was 3 times.  Once he was born I remember Jeff telling me to open my eyes and see my son.  I didn't want to.  I didn't want any of that to be happening because it was a sure death sentence for my first child.  But I did.  I heard him whimper once and then they passed him through what looked like a drive through window into the NICU.  The nurses all remarked how great it was that he made a tiny noise. 

I remember Jeff saying, "Praise God!" once Jonathan came out.  I thought to myself "Why is he saying that?  This is a horrible situation."

I laid on the table in a daze while the doctors and nurses did whatever they had to do to me.  I tried to block everything out.  I felt ashamed and like a failure.

About an hour or so later I was put in a wheelchair and taken to the NICU to see my son, Jonathan, which means "gift from God".  I had never seen anything so tiny and helpless as he laid there squirming, IVs running through his tiny body, eyes fused shut.  I didn't have much experience with newborns, but I knew they weren't supposed to look like that.

Later we were put in our new room on the maternity floor.  I could hear babies being rolled up and down the hallway, where their mothers were waiting in their rooms to nurse their little bundles of joy and cuddle with them.  I, on the other hand, got cozy with a breast pump and waited for the visit from the neonatologist.

The news was grim: Jonathan was born at less than 2 pounds with an E. Coli infection in his bloodstream, and it may or may not be in his spinal fluid and brain.  His lungs were severely underdeveloped.  In short, he was very sick and all things considered the outlook was not good.  The doctor told us he would know more if Jonathan survived the next 48 hours.

Until I was discharged from the hospital a couple of days later, I would pump and Jeff and I would take the milk down to the NICU where it would be put in a freezer for if and when Jonathan was ready to tolerate it.  We spent a lot of time by his incubator praying for him and crying, but trying to be strong in front of our family, who was as distraught as we were.  I can remember one day in the cafeteria with my mom where I finally broke down crying, saying "I should still be pregnant.  It isn't fair that he is struggling to live.  He should still be safe inside me."  I had to be reminded that he was sick inside of me and had he not been born, he might have died.

The day I was discharged, we were blessed to have a room at the Ronald McDonald House to go to, so we were only a block away.  I had been at the hospital for a week already, though, so we had a lot of stuff to take with us.  I had been given flowers and an "It's a Boy!" balloon, which was tied to the wheelchair.  As I was being wheeled out with all my stuff and my balloon, I tried to avoid all the looks that asked "Where is the baby?"

I cried driving the block from the hospital to the McDonald House because we were leaving our baby behind in a medical institution, and there was no body and no amount of money that could get him out.

116 days later, we were finally able to bring him home with us.  We had dreamed of that day for so long, and a few times we thought death would claim our son before we had the chance to bring him home.  But thank God for saving our son.  Jonathan has lived up to his name in every sense; God has truly given us such a great gift.

Jonathan the day he was born, and now at 20 months old.

Tomorrow morning around 8:30 we will meet our second son, Isaac.  I'm not sure what his birth story will be like, but God is faithful and he is good; I have high hopes. 

If you want to read more in detail about Jonathan's hospital stay, click on the CaringBridge link at the top of the page.
 

Wow, it's been over a month since the last post.  I guess I have been busy nesting and resting and not thinking about writing. 

The biggest thing that we've experienced is Jonathan starting to walk.  This would be a great place to insert a video but I don't have one (what a bad mommy!).  I do have a picture of him mid-stride, though.



Hands up and out to the sides and laughing as he walks.

Obviously, we were so excited when he started taking his own steps.  He still crawls when he needs to get somewhere quickly (like down the hall to his room), but almost half the time he prefers to walk.

He has also learned to identify things using words.  A few of the words in his arsenal: pup-pah (puppy), meh (meow, which he says when he sees our cat), cah (car), baou (ball), tuh-DOU (touchdown...don't ask why he knows this).  Then he has code words that only we know the meaning of:  ha HA ha means he wants to watch a Three Little Pigs cartoon he is currently obsessed with; bah bah BAH bah is Brown Bear Brown Bear; ba ba BA is Yo Gabba Gabba.  It might sound far-fetched but I am telling the truth: we have decoded some if his jibber jabber.  There are still some things that he says that I have no idea what he means, but the important thing is that he is communicating!

I am now in my third trimester (33 weeks to be exact).  It isn't as bad as the first, but it is pretty uncomfortable.  We have made it almost 10 weeks further than we did with Jonathan which is so amazing to us!  We never thought I'd be pregnant for so long and it is such a blessing to be able to experience this and have the peace of mind that this baby will (hopefully) have a much less eventful beginning to his life than his brother Jonathan did.  I am scheduled to have the cerclage removed on Feb. 15, my last day of being 36 weeks pregnant (that's 1 day shy of being full-term).  BUT so far baby James is breech.  If he doesn't flip by then, they will not remove the stitch and schedule me for a C-section, then remove the stitch at the same time.  I know C-sections happen all the time, but I am really looking forward to labor (weird, I know) and will be disappointed if I can never experience that (our local hospital does not do VBAC). 

BUUUUUT God is sovereign and He knows what way is best for me and James, and whatever God ordains is right. 

Jeff is still in school at RTS in Orlando.  He is gearing up to start his Spring semester and has already begun yet another online class.  I can tell when he is starting new classes because a steady stream of books starts to arrive in the mail.  We bought a huge bookshelf about a year ago, and we have a good collection of books then, but now it's overflowing like crazy.  Almost all the books on there are theology-related, and about 1/3-1/4 are books that have been purchased just since Jeff started seminary.  I have never seen a person go through so many books in such a short amount of time!  But, I have never lived with someone pursuing a Master's degree, either, which is in a whole other league compared to a Bachelor's, not to mention that RTS is a prestigious school so they are going to make you work to be able to call yourself an alumnus.  How he does it all while still performing his duty at church and being an AWESOME dad and husband I will never know!  But thank God he is able.

So that's the Skipper household in a nutshell.  I wanted to write about an awesome series I have been reading on the meaning of marriage based on Paul's teaching in Ephesians 5, but that will have to wait.  So much good stuff in there, though!  If you want to read it yourself, here are the first 2 parts:

Part 1: A Picture Perfect Marriage

Part 2: The Wife's Role

20 Weeks Preggo!

Since the last blog post I have gotten more pregnant, yay!  I have seen the doctor probably 3 times since the last post, and each time everything looked great!  We are so encouraged that we will carry closer to full-term (if not all the way).  I guess I will have to post the obligatory belly picture soon since I am starting to show.  The baby is moving constantly, and I love to feel him or her kicking and squirming, and watching my belly jump around.  I can't help but think of Psalm 139:13-16 that say,

For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

It is so comforting to know that while we can see an imperfect picture of our baby on a sonogram, the Lord sees him or her perfectly, and is forming that little body inside of me; each day of his or her life is already known by Him.  Thank God nothing comes as a surprise to Him!

We go to the Maternal-Fetal doctor next Friday for yet another check up.  We haven not decided if we will find out the baby's gender, but getting ultrasounds every 2 weeks is making it very hard to hold out til March!  Once we hit 24 weeks preggo, I think the ultrasounds and doctor appts. are not going to be as frequent.  The goal is 40 weeks, but 23 weeks is when I went into preterm labor with Jonathan, so these upcoming weeks the doctors are going to be watching me and baby like hawks.

Speaking of baby J, today would have been his due date and first birthday!  Crazy that he is already 15 months old.  Like the Psalm above said, the Lord had each of his days ordained from conception, and although we weren't expecting J to come 16 weeks early, God was.  We thank Him every day for the mercy and faithfulness He showed us in the NICU, and even now.  Jonathan is the light of our lives and such a testimony to the power of prayer and the goodness of God.

Jonathan hanging out with Daddy on Little Gasparilla Island.

The weather has finally cooled off a little here, it is in the 50s outside right now, but it will warm up to the low 70s later.  I have a pumpkin cooking in the crock pot for some homemade whole wheat pumpkin muffins, no canned pumpkin in this house!  We'll see how those turn out (you can get the recipe here).  One thing is for sure: this Fall weather really makes me feel domestic!

Is there a doctor in the house?

A lot of medical things going on in the family right now!

Jonathan has had a cold since Monday, and it has been getting worse as the week progresses.  Last night, he only slept for 1-2 hours at a time and stayed awake for almost 2 hours at a time.  All the while, Jeff was in bed with a sinus infection, so I am a tired girl today!  I took Jonathan to the Dr. this morning and we are doing Albuterol breathing treatments until this passes.  He hasn't had a high fever and he is happy when he is awake, so we are thankful for that!  Jeff is also on steroids and antibiotic so hopefully he will be feeling better soon, too.  It's hard on Mommy when both my boys are sick!

Also, Jeff and I went to the Maternal-Fetal specialist yesterday to see what the plan is for this pregnancy.  Just for background:  I had multiple complications with the last pregnancy that may or may not have caused Jonathan to be born early:

1. I have a septated uterus (you can Google that), but we didn't know about it at the time.
2. When Jonathan was born, we discovered E. Coli bacteria had taken up residence in the placenta, anmiotic fluid, and Jonathan's blood stream.  I had no symptoms of this infection, and the body's defense against infection during pregnancy is to get the baby out (otherwise I could've taken antibiotics).
3. I had/have a weak cervix (the part of the body that keeps the baby in), so when Jonathan got too heavy, out he came.  Also, a weak cervix would make it easier for bacteria to travel up to the baby and infect it.

With all that said, it seems like the most likely situation for me is that I have an incompetent cervix.  This is good news because this can be helped with a simple surgery called a cerclage.  It's outpatient surgery that takes only a few hours and a spinal epidural.  The doctor said if this is the reason why Jonathan came early (and they can't be 100% sure that it is), then I have a 90+% chance of carrying the baby full term.  We are so excited about this, I cannot imagine carrying a baby that far!  We are still waiting to hear the exact date of surgery, but it will for sure be two weeks from now.  After that, the doctors will check the stitch every two weeks or so and make sure it is holding up.

After the surgery, I will have to be off my feet for a week or so.  Luckily, my awesome mom is flying in from Texas to help around the house and we are so excited to see her!  She hasn't seen Jonathan since last Thanksgiving so I know she is so excited, too.  He has come so far since then!

Granny and Jonathan, Thanksgiving 2010

Please keep Jeff in your prayers as he waits for relief from the intense pressure in his head, and pray that Jonathan would start to get better soon as well.  Also, please keep me and Baby in prayer as we prepare for surgery and whatever life for our family will look like after that.

Also, any comments or emails about people you know who have had successful cerclages would be much appreciated and encouraging!

Love,

    The Skippers

New Things

"He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” - Revelation 21:5

This blog used to be called "Jonathan's Journey" because that was the biggest thing in our lives for a long time. And in a way, Jonathan definitely is still the biggest thing. But God is doing so much within our family that it seemed like a new blog was appropriate. So here is Skipperific.

God has literally made everything new in our lives.  Jonathan is totally healthy and no longer on any medication or oxygen.  I am pregnant again and having a completely healthy pregnancy so far.  Jeff has completed his first year of Seminary with a 3.8 GPA, while working full-time at the church and being an amazing husband and father.  God has provided everything we need, and we are so humbled to see the place of abundance that He has brought us to within the last year.  What a journey!

The suffix -fic means "making or creating".  This blog will hopefully illustrate how the Author and Perfecter or our faith and lives is making and creating the Skipper family into His image, while keeping long distance family and friend updated about our lives.  My hope is that you will see God's sovereignty in our lives, and begin to realize that He is sovereign over yours, too.

Summer Fun!

I know it's been a while since this blog was updated (about 5 months...) but we have been very busy!

In the past 5 months, Jonathan has become potty trained, is taking cooking lessons and plans to start college in the Fall.


Not really, but it seems that way!  He has come SO far.  In January, he was just starting to become interested in the world around him, and every now and then we would get a smile or giggle.  Now, he is constantly babbling and laughing and smiles at the slightest encouragement.

Also, he has started physical therapy because he is "behind".  That means, even though he is 11 months old, he isn't doing what most 11 month old babies do (according to the physical therapist's special test).  Also, since he had grade 3 brain bleeds on both sides of his brain, that puts him at a higher risk of developmental impairments, so PT can help with that, too.  Not to mention, his physical therapist, Michelle, is really good with him and we have seen so much progress.  He is finally pushing himself up on his arms! 

He has also stopped taking all his medications (thank you, Lord!) and is doing well.  He still sees all of his doctors, but they are mostly just monitoring him.  His brain bleeds are not a concern for us at this point; he goes to see the kidney doctor this summer to see if his kidney reflux is gone (it seems to be); his retina doctor has released him from his care (and that was KIND OF sad because we had been seeing him so much!); and we have a sleep study next Tuesday night to see if we can finally get off this oxygen (he is still on oxygen at night).  Oh yeah, we are also off the apnea monitor which is awesome because when it would go off our hearts would stop (they were always false alarms, though).

Jonathan is eating really well, too.  He isn't eating table food yet, but he loves baby food.  My mom just bought me a Baby Bullet to make our own baby food.  I've made bananas and brown rice so far and he loved it! 

Speaking of my mom, she just left from a 10 day visit.  We all went to Anna Maria Island for 3 of those days:  me, Jeff, Jonathan, my mom, Jeff's parents, Jeff's sister and her fiance.  We rented a house and it was HEAVEN!  We decided we need to stay a week next year instead of just 3 days.   Here are some pics from the trip.

Jonathan in his beach tent.

Awesome AMI sunset, with the moon rise in the upper left corner.

Baby J was upset when the wave hit him, but he got over it.